In my work as a coach and facilitator for mission-driven organizations, I’m noticing a troubling pattern: every decision feels like a lose-lose situation, with a heightened risk of moral injury. Many leaders are asking themselves: Do I comply, defy, or lie? Leaders are constantly grappling with impossible choices. Every day, it feels like our core values are on the chopping block. There’s No Easy Answer—But There Is Another Question…
Read MoreThis concept of “shoulding yourself,” coined by psychologist Clayton Barbeau, speaks to the distorted thinking and guilt-ridden pressures that many of us put ourselves through when the going gets tough. By “shoulding” ourselves into feeling or being a certain way, we block our ability to effectively process our grief, give ourselves what we truly need, and build resilience for the future.
Read MoreWhat we truly need are cultures that center these conversations, so everyone can safely and courageously ask for what they need–regardless of title or placement on the org chart. That shift starts with having well-placed people on the inside who can courageously speak up for what is needed--this includes you. We have to be the change we want to see, not just in the world but in our own organizations.
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